Friday, February 04, 2005

I need sleep......

I am sitting on the computer trying to keep myself awake so I do not go to bed to early.

I want to tell you a little bit about my family. My parents separated when I was 12 after many years of making us kids crazy with all of the fighting. My dad was in the military and he had a few different side jobs to bring in extra money and mostly to have an excuse to leave the house so he could sleep around with slut he could find.

I have a half sister from my dad. Her name is Tammy and she is 8 years older than I am. I have only met her a few times. I don't see my dad's side of the family much. She looks nothing like the rest of my dad's kids. He had her with his first marriage and when her mom died she moved in with her aunt on her mothers side. Dad has never been around for his own kids. He was more of a father to my step-brother than he ever was to any of his "real" children.

I have a brother who is in Iraq right now. Billy will be 25 in March. We don't talk much he did call me once at 3am because he was "bored". He never bothered to call me or even e-mail me when he was still here. I guess no one else was up to talk to him. I keep updated on him from mom.

The twins are 20. Jessica and Paul. Paul lives with dad and is still in high school. I am not sure what grade he is in and if I must tell the truth I do not care. He should be out of school by now.

My sister and I have a crazy history and I will go into that deeper on another day. I will give a little bit of her background. At one time I had guardianship over her because our parents wanted nothing to do with her. Jessica spent some time in jail for robbery and I use to visit her and accept all her calls, send her money and listen to her play the pity me roll. I even went to court to help her get out of jail sooner. After all I felt sorry for her we both came from the same fucked up parents. Jessica is one that will just disappear one day and you just have to wait to see when she will pop up again and then you know that she is still alive. For a very short time Jessica had a real address, she was living with some friends that she grew up with. I decided one day to just show up so Anna could visit with her Aunt Jessica and her girlfriend let me in on Jessica's secret.......Jessica moved in with Anna's father. YES! My sister was living with my daughters father. I called her on the cell that he had bought her and left a message to let her know that her secret was out and she has never called me back. I don't care because he is a major loser anyway. I just can not believe that she would be with someone who has put me through so much crap. (I will get into all of that later)

So that is just a little look into my family members. I do not talk to any of them much. I feel better when I stay away from them. I drink a lot less when they are away.


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