Thursday, April 13, 2006

it's that time of year again

SANDAL PLEDGE

Just a friendly reminder, it's that time of year again.
Please raise your big toes and repeat after me:
As a member of the Diva Sisterhood, I pledge to follow. THE RULES when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes:




I promise to always wear sandals that fit.My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.





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I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.







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I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow. I will shave the hairs off my big toe.





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I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed gorlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.






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If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back in the place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.







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I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Sholl's if my feet need him.






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I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kid's sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat, and I would hate to take someine down with me as I fall and break my ankle.






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I will take my toe ring off towards the end of the day if my toe swells and begin to look like Vienna sausages.






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I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are to ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her her toes look like they have been dragged behind her car on the way to work and not snadal in the world is going to make her feet look good.





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I will promise if I wear flip flops, that I will ensure they actually flip flop, making the correct noise while walking and I willswear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.





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I will promise to go to my local beauty school at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $15 and worth EVERY penny). I say spend another $15 and get an even better one.








Last but not least....PLEASE DON"T DO THIS..........

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I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear...nothing is tackier then dirty white sandals....

For all our sakes, please don't keep this to yourself - pass it on to other Sisters. May God Bless your Soles and well as your Soles!

10 Comments:

Blogger David said...

wow someone else wears SOCKS inside their sandals, my daughter always gives me crap over this, now I know that my kind of cool is just rare, not extinct ( i am referring to your LAST picture. quite a helpful guide, even though we had rain and SNOW today, grrrrrrr

11:47 PM  
Blogger kenju said...

Extremely good advice, Dawn!
Michele sent me.

11:56 PM  
Blogger shpprgrl said...

Those socks/sandals are too scary! icccky! I love summer shoes, they are my favorite. I can get a pedi at our beauty school for $8! I love it! Thanks for visiting me!

11:58 PM  
Blogger OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

Very good advice and if I still wore any of these kinds of shoes I woulds heed it! Broke a toe once and never wore these kinds of shoes again!

Here from Michele's tonight!

12:10 AM  
Blogger Lady E said...

This cracks me up. I think I will go and get a pedicure now. Bye Bye.

2:49 PM  
Blogger That Girl said...

this needs to be printed and hung where everyone i work with can see it.

8:19 AM  
Blogger kenju said...

Michele sent me back tonight. When I looked for sandals to wear this morning, the first thing I checked was to see if my foot hung over the back edge!

10:20 PM  
Blogger T. said...

I am so glad Michele sent me. I love your rules for Sandals. They should make everyone read this before are allowed to buy sandals! I am bookmarking you baby, so I will be back!

10:23 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Fun said...

its open toe shoe weather here year round. I love it. And i just bought a pair of white heeled flip flops,woohoo.

and i had no idea they still sold jelly shoes.

12:06 PM  
Blogger feetman78 said...

Love the post!!!

5:03 PM  

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