this is what my life is like

Wow

2009-08-03T18:53:00.002-05:00

It's been almost a year since my last post. I had a lot of bad things going on over the last year and have been on the road to making a lot of changes. I was reading some of my past blogs. I'm funny...lol

I am just going to use this blog to post my rants and stuff. I don't think anyone even comes around here anymore. It's cool though. I need to just vent to myself sometimes. I have other blogs...but is blogging even cool anymore?

2008-11-27T13:38:00.001-05:00

Have a great day everyone! I plan on eating everything not bolted down and then mapping out the shopping trip for tomorrow....

OMG

2008-11-22T17:37:00.001-05:00

This is sooo funny. I should not be on the computer watching this stuff but I just had to share. Please watch this and let me know what you think...this is tooo funny!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GQ2yIqt83k

need i say more

2008-11-19T22:16:00.001-05:00

http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/11/19/obama.alqaeda/index.html

potty time

2008-11-16T11:10:00.002-05:00

I am still mad about the whole bathroom this this week. I had to use the bathroom at the end of the day at work but I decided to hold it...and this is why.........

I walked into the bathroom in the nice office building that I work in and I was in the "women's" bathroom and there was piss on the floor.....now, correct me if I am wrong...I may have been taught wrong by my mother...but when a lady goes to the bathroom she should sit her ass on the toilet seat. I mean....I live with 2 boys and a man (who sometimes acts like a boy) and of course we have the boys friends over...so that's a lot of "toilet seat leaving up piss on the toilet seat type of boys" right? Wrong! I never have to put a seat down.....maybe once every few months....never have piss on the toilet seat...why do women have to be so nasty. I have decided to start using the men's bathroom.....they are cleaner and they do not bleed on the toilet seat either (or at least I hope they don't).

I got an email from a friend that will describe a trip to a public bathroom (for those men who may not understand what we go through)

When you have to visit a public toilet, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the cubicle doors.Every cubicle is occupied.

Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the cubicle. You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants!The dispenser for the modern 'seat covers' (invented by someone's Mum, no doubt) is handy, but empty. You would hang your bag on the door hook, if there was one, so you carefully, but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mum would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR!) down with your pants and assume ' The Stance.

In this position, your aging, toneless, thigh muscles begin to shake. You'd love to sit down, but having not taken time to wipe the seat or to lay toilet paper on it, you hold 'The Stance.' To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser. In your mind, you can hear your mother's voice saying, 'Dear, if you had tried to clean the seat, you would have KNOWN there was no toilet paper!' Your thighs shake more. You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday - the one that's still in your bag (the bag around your neck, that now you have to hold up trying not to strangle yourself at the same time). That would have to do, so you crumple it in the puffiest way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail. Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work. The door hits your bag, which is hanging around your neck in front of your chest and you and your bag topple backward against the tank of the toilet. 'Occupied!' you scream, as you reach for the door, dropping your precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, while losing your footing altogether and sliding down directly onto the TOILET SEAT. It is wet of course. You bolt up, knowing all too well that it's too late. Your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet paper - not that there was any, even if you had taken time to try. You know that your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because you're certain her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat because, frankly, dear, 'You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you could get. By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a fire hose against the inside of the bowl and spraying a fine mist of water that covers your bum and runs down your legs and into your shoes. The flush somehow sucks everything down with such force and you grab onto the empty toilet paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in too. At this point, you give up. You're soaked by the spewing water and the wet toilet seat. You're exhausted. You try to wipe with a sweet wrapper you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously to the sinks. You can't figure out how to operate the taps with the automatic sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel and walk past the line of women still waiting You are no longer able to smile politely to them. A kind soul at the very end of the line points out a piece of toilet paper trailing from your shoe. (Where was that when you NEEDED it?) You yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and tell her warmly, 'Here, you just might need this. As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used and left the men's toilet. Annoyed, he asks, 'What took you so long and why is your bag hanging around your neck? This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with any public rest rooms/toilets (rest??? you've GOT to be kidding!!). It finally explains to the men what really does take us so long. It also answers that other commonly asked question about why women go to the toilets in pairs. It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your bag and hand you Kleenex under the door.

This HAD to be written by a woman! No one else could describe it so accurately.

too cute

2008-11-10T19:24:00.002-05:00

I'm too cute for all this anger. I spent the weekend with my daughter cleaning of the yard and picking up all the leaves that fell on Friday night. It was a nice quite weekend at home....I was upset when Monday got here.....back to the same B.S.

Enjoy your family and be happy! Life is too short to care what other stupid people decide to do...I have to make my lunch for tomorrow and get some rest because I am really tired and I have to get up to go to the gym in the morning!

nigga pleze

2008-11-06T06:35:00.002-05:00

So, I thought my rant was over but here I am again....I got a text message from someone last night and this is what it said:

(THIS JUST IN): ALL WHITE PEOPLE MUST REPORT TO THE COTTON FIELDS TOMORROW MORNING AT 7 AM FOR ORIENTATION sincerely yours, president-elect obama

First, I was shocked that someone would send that out to me....second because we have to work together and that would not be a pretty show..but guess what I'm not a nigger so I won't go there....what I will say "em me ax u a qwesh'in?! do you really think that the president has any "real" power? Your such stupid fucks...it's the local government that tell the puppet president what to do...it's those elections that matter the most. The only white people are going to get together to do is to plan the death of stupid niggers that think that we will be slaves...guess what else...your still niggers...that's right I said it...act like a nigger and get treated like a nigger....that's the way the world goes...but you should know that because you had to pick cotton from the time you were a baby..until your dear president elect got into office...please what else are you gonna bitch about now...your never happy....always need to find something to bitch about that that the government can keep giving you free handouts.

I just got another text you might want to pass around to all the white people you know:

How do you say Obama in Chinese?
Coon=soon=die

I will leave you with some morning reading (if you can read):

I found this on the home page on CNN.com news:

http://www.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/europe/11/05/russia.missiles/index.html

what happened?

2008-11-05T05:27:00.003-05:00

America has no idea what they have done....stupid people....stupid...stupid! It's going to be a horrible day at work. I work with mostly blacks and if McCain would have won the election they would all talk about how it was the "white man's set up" and it would not be "appropriate" for me to talk about a McCain victory.....but I will hear about Osama all day long. Well, no...I won't...that's what they made Ipod's for.

I'm also tired of hearing about how Republicans are racist but if your behind the "black" man because you do not want to have "the white man" in office than your are not racist...also, you have to show how "black" you are by voting for a 1/10 black man (please....i'm more black than he is...you should have voted for me) terrorist, Muslim. So, do you feel more black now this morning....how about the lonely white women who have the "black" man fantasy....does it make you REAL hot to know you got Osama in office?

Here is the crazy part....I was on the phone last night with my mother and we were looking at "I HATE OBAMA" T-Shirts and I found this one http://gawker.com/370913/who-killed-obama-asks-sweatshirt online at http://www.zazzle.com/shop we were looking at them before the election was called and as soon as it was called they removed the shirt off the site....never to be seen again.

no clever title

2008-10-30T05:05:00.003-05:00

I have no clever title. I think I forgot how to do that anyways because it has been SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO very long since I have bothered to post on here. I miss everyone who use to visit. I'm not even sure what happend or why I stopped. I guess life just got in the way...don't you hate when that happens?

Life is pretty calm right now and there is not a lot of drama going on unless I think about my day and then there is a lot going on...it's kinda crazy to think about.

I guess I stopped using the blog because I wanted to keep some things to myself and not share with people I work with or have them find me on the web...I heard people would get fired over a blog and I just did not want to be one of "those people"...now with so many people losing their jobs...I guess my chances are as good as anybodys ;)

But really, If I had to really think about my days at work to share with you or even life it would make for an interesting read so I think that I will come back...for real this time. I hope I can get some readers back...haha!

So, take this time to say welcome back and I will make a post later!

bums and stuff

2008-01-19T20:14:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I had to take my daughter to get her Xmas gifts from a family member today and I decided to take a trip to Target.

I wanted to purchase a dry erase board to work with Anna on...she is home schooled now so I wanted to purchase one instead of wasting so much paper plus it's good for her to learn how to take notes.

Anyways, back to my story. I was in my car at a traffic light near a bus stop and I saw a bum walking up the street looking in cars...nothing new there they all try to get money almost on every street corner..it's pretty bad. I saw this woman look at the guy in the car next to mine. She motioned to him to have him roll his window down...they talked for about 20 seconds and the emerged with a cigarette....yes, she really bummed a cigarette from a guy in this car in front of me...she did not need a light though because she still had a cigar lit so she used that to light the cigarette.....I am sure that she bummed that cigar also.

I can't believe that the guy actually gave it to her...maybe I am just stuck up...no I am not really stuck up I am just sick of all the begging....it gets old really quick!

I am sitting here on the computer and I should be getting Anna's work together for tomorrow but I decided to take a break and share with you a little piece of my day.

fights and ice cream

2008-01-18T22:00:00.001-05:00

I took the day off work today because I just did not feel like going in today. I should have been good today and I should have cleaned or work really hard on the portfolio for my homeschool meeting next month but I did not do that. Instead I picked a fight with my best (maybe X) best friend from high school. We brought up (or rather she brought up) some things from the past...we have not really talked since the summer time (my fault) over something stupid but I am gonna hold my ground on this. I brought up something that happened this summer she went back 11-12 years....how can you keep something bottled up that long? I don't get it? Was our friendship one sided..does she feel like she gave more and I gave less....I know that my life is far from perfect but I thought that it made things colorful for us....I guess not!

Oh well, I don't want to talk about it anymore tonight because I know that I am gonna cry...I hate to think about the past...I have moved so far from it and I just don't want to go back there right now!

Anna had her 11th birthday on Wednesday....I am a mother of an 11 year old...Wow, I'm old. I took the day off on Wed. to spend with her and we went shopping...she is really into fashion now and she wanted to get some "staple" items to start a new wardrobe. It was fun and we had a really good day.

We tried to go to Cold Stone for ice cream but they were out of EVERYTHING....really, they were out of bananas, strawberries, banana ice cream, chocolate chips, brownies, yellow cake....and some other stuff I can't remember...the guy told me that he could not go to the grocery store because he was the only one there...who did he think that he was gonna sell "nothing" to? We had to go to another Cold Stone to get out ice cream. That was just crazy and silly but an idea of how my week has been.

I was reading some of my old post and I really have not wrote anything in quite some time...like 2 years ago I just stopped....I have some interesting post (to me anyways) and I just stopped....I will do better this year. I am really gonna try!

resolution

2008-01-01T20:24:00.000-05:00

So this is what I have to say to those people who will take up my space at the gym so that they can work out for about 2 weeks until they give up their resolution to lose weight. I stayed at home all night and went to be around 1am. We did nothing special and today I have really just sat around and have done nothing all day! I did make part of my meals for tomorrow because I do have to watch what I am eating not only for weight reasons but also because I have spent a lot of money going out to eat when I am at work.

I am already tired and it's only 8:30...I need some energy! Let me get off this computer before I fall asleep.

2007-12-31T21:24:00.000-05:00

Ok, so after I put up my post about how nobody loves me I get to comments in less than 24 hour after not having a post for MONTHS!!! I really do feel loved OR my friends have nothing better to do then check up on blogs that have no been updated in FOREVER!!!

Really, I do feel loved and I was pleasantly surprised to see that I have not one but two comments! I hope everyone have a Happy New Year and that you all are not to hung over in the morning. I really will try to update this blog more...I can't and won't make any promises but I am going to give it my best shot.

My stepson told me that I am old because my husband and I are staying home tonight. I just do not feel like fighting all the drunks out there. I would rather stay in my nice warm house and get drunk ;)

What do you do? Do you stay home or go out? Why?

so sad

2007-12-30T18:39:00.000-05:00

I am not really sure why I will not let this blog go....it had its good days and now it is no longer in use. I come by to go to a few links that I have that are still updated other links I hae updated in my favs on my computer. I feel like I really don't have anything good ot interesting to say and then if I do I have lost all my readers so what is the point of making a post if nobody will read it. I guess I should not feel like that and I should just blog anyways but it has lost its appeal but I still sit here and I refuse to let it go.....so sad really. I guess if I am not going to let it go that I really need to keep it up to date then. There is not to much going on right now.

Please give me something to talk about!!!

ok, so I have been busy

2007-07-25T00:02:00.000-05:00

Or not really into this...sorry, there are not that many people left who read this blog...and are blogs even the "in" thing anymore? I guess I have a lot of things that are changing and I am not even sure anymore if people even stop by for me...I can't really blame you though...cuz, I totally neglect you. I try though and I think about it but I have other things going on that take center stage...sorry!

I got a new puppy..ain't he cute?!?!?!?! He is a mini Chihuahua...I am not a dog type of person and I hate people who bring their pets to non pet stores....but he in not really a pet but my baby...I took him to the vet today and he is about 2lbs..he will only get to be about 3lbs....I NEVER thought that I could love a "silly ol' dog" as much as I do. He's not really like a "real" dog but more like a pampered little thing...His name is Digger (my husband decided on the name) and he is a pretty good puppy.

He had to get his shots today and was not to happy with me.

I am off work today and the next 2 days..this is my schd..I only work 4 days a week (10 hrs a day) and I love it. We are going to go to a baseball game on Thursday and I can't wait. I will take pixs for ya'll....I'm going to go to the gym tomorrow...I need to start walking at least 3 miles a day. I need to get this weight off before my 30th birthday (may 9th).

I will talk to ya'll later!

rested

2007-06-03T12:28:00.000-05:00

I am feeling pretty good now. I am on vacation for another week. I go back to work on Friday. We took a trip south to pick up my stepson because he got out of school last week. Here in Maryland the kids are still in school for another 2 weeks. Anyhoo, I ate at my first ever Cracker Barrel so I had to get a picture of it. It was pretty good. We don't have one near us so I wanted to try it. I know some of the pictures are bad and this one is fuzzy because I took it in the rental car we had. I ate chicken and dumplings...they would have been better if they had veggies mixed in with it but a girl can't have everything all the time. We ate close to Earnhardt Jr's home and we saw the trailer that was taking his car to Dover for the race this weekend. That was pretty cool.

The next day we went to Long Horn to eat lunch and that was really good also. We had a burger and fries. The waiter was real nice but he is not really from FL. he was from PA. my hubby wanted to take this picture for my daughter and stepson because he thought it was cool....I think the picture came out pretty good. After lunch we went to see some of my hubby's family. He has not seem them in years and I have never been introduce since we have been together. He has a nice family. We went to see his Aunt.

On our trip I saw this in someones front yard and were we are from you do not have things that
will grow in our yard like this so I had to take a picture. Cool hu? Unless you are from FL. and see stuff like this all the time. I guess this pictures in for my buddies who do not see this like me ;)

Apparently this person also has a green thumb unlike me...I thought it was cool enough to share with ya'll.

Ok, so in FL. they have "love bugs" I did not understand at first and did not really see any in Orlando but I did see them on our final day in FL. and they are nasty. I guess people who live there are use to them and they make a mess on you car and there have been several people that have been in an accident because they do not clean off their car
so that they can see out of the window. From what I heard the best way to get it off your car is with soda. The "love bugs" mate and the men can only mate twice and then they die the female "love bugs" will die after they lay 300 eggs. they were everywhere and we tried to stop to go to the bathroom and they were on the bathroom sign, benches, dead on the floor going into the bathroom, and we were only parked for about 5 min and we must of had at least 100 "love bugs" on our car....do you see the love bugs on the windshield??? It's 2 "getting their freak on".

And just so that you can see I am not
kidding look at the front of our rental car...this was after hubby cleaned it off...look what was still stuck to the front of the car.......all those little black spots are love bugs.....yuck! We had a rental that had Illinois tags and even back home we keep getting looked at like we are and "outsider" haha. Oh well, home sweet home...I missed Maryland so much and I am glad to be back home.

I have a few other pics I will share later. I just wanted to share a few now. I did learn a lesson though...Dorothy said it best "there is no place like home."

A little help

2007-05-28T20:43:00.000-05:00

Ok, I don't normally ask for anything on here but I think that it would be great if you can take time out of your day to visit a very special dancer. Her name is Tara - Karina and she is a wonderful dancer on the pole. She had a video on youtube and also has a new blog.

her blog address is http://tara-karinas-pole-lessons.blogspot.com/ please check it out and there is also a video posted on her blog that you shoudl watch the video is also in her you tube acct. check it out when you get a chance..... http://youtube.com/taraspolelessons she knows her stuff and is very graceful with her moves. Stop reading what I am writing and go visit her already!!!!!!

hello again

2007-05-21T08:37:00.000-05:00

I am gonna keep this short and sweet. I don't have much timet his morning and I am sooooo tired. I have not had my breakfast/lunch and I need to make my dinner or see if my hubby is gonna make me dinner. Then I have to get my "little" workout in because I do not have time for a full workout. I was online this morning trying to catch up to some things today and its just so hard. I hope that I can get caught up today and I am not behind because I go on vacation again next week and I have lots to do before then. I only work 3 1/2 days before I start my vacation....O Joy!!!!

On saturday I am going on a "girls night out" to a local strip club and we will have the VIP room and that will be soooo much fun....I can't wait for that!!!

2007-05-19T08:47:00.000-05:00

another post

2007-05-19T08:37:00.000-05:00

I am working on it ya'll...so this is like the 4th post in a row..can you believe it??? I am gonna keep it short though. I have to make my lunch and get ready for work and I wanted to get some pole practice in before I have to leave.

I just wanted to say that I did delete my other 2 blogs and only have 2 left this one and the one with my James posts. I will start the mobile blogging on this one. I got up this morning to walk because I was reading this book on how to lose weight and it made a comment about the 10,000 steps per day with a pedometer and guess what my weekly average for steps are???? Guess......about 700 steps a day (sad hu???) I had no idea that I was that inactive...no wonder I have put on some weight. This has to change now!!!!! I am at 617 steps now for the day...I want to increase my steps to 2500 this week staring tomorrow. Wish me luck everyone!!!

what now???

2007-05-18T09:27:00.000-05:00

Ok, I am not sure what to do....I have several blogs and I think that I may only keep 3 of them.....my "am I doing this right blog" my "James post"(my crazy past) and this blog. I was gonna have another blog with all my pole stuff on it but I decided not to. Just one blog for almost everything and the only reason that I am gonna keep 3....(no, on second thought I may just keep 2 blogs. I will have my "James" post blog and this one...I can't keep up with one why do I think I can do more??? Oh well, I will start my daily food log on here starting today! The only reason I will still have the other blog is to keep that whole story together and I know I need to add another past and I will soon.

Anyways, I am gonna keep everything in one place becasue this blog is about me and if you are here its only fair for you to see the whole me...right??? The whole weightloss, pictures I take with my cell phone camera and my lovely pole. If you have any questions about pole dancing or how to get your own pole please ask and I can point you in the right direction.

I'm over it now....

2007-05-17T17:54:00.000-05:00

If you happened to read my last post then you know I was having a bad day. I am not gonna take the post down...it is a post that I started a while back and decided to finish last night. I am sick of trying to his the way that I feel and well, I let it all out last night.

Anyways, if you do not want to read a whole lot of bad language then skip the post below.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today is a new day and I am tyring out some new pole moves and I know that I will pay for it tomorrow but that is part of the fun ;) I can not stay on here long because my pole is calling me back and is lonely...haha. I wish I had more room to work out in but oh well....it will come soon enough I hope ;)

violated

2007-05-16T20:22:00.000-05:00

I feel violated and hurt and I hate that bitch!!! I am so pissed off at my "mother" and I am sick of the lying and sick of the bullshit and I am going to let her have a piece of my mind!!! There is so much bull shit and all because I knew that she was reading my blog I stopped writing and stopped my personal space to make sure that she could not take away my thoughts and look at where I am at now...nowhere. I never come on here anymore. I am ready to close this blog and I just hate this whole thing!!! She has lied and hurt me for the last time and I quit...I quit caring...I quit being her daughter and I quit having a mother.

What did I ever do to deserve the hatred that is shown to me???? That bitch tried to have my locked up for no reason just to try to take my daughter away from me. She made sure that my daughter saw her (cousin/half sister and her "father" a week and a half ago) against my wishes! I hate her and I hope she has found this new blog and I hope that she can see how much I truly hate her!!! I want nothing more to do with that backstabbing two faced bitch! I also have no respect for anyone who stumbles along this blog to judge my feelings towards that cunt because "you have no idea".

I also want to say that it feels good to let this go right now because this whole thing is bullshit. I can't even begin to explain how much I hat her and everything that she symbolizes. My father will not step into the middle of how much I hate her but I do.

I hate that she has taken my life and trashed it....I hate how she called me a "gutter rat" I hate how she made me be such a hateful person. I hate that she does not acknowledge my marriage to my husband (not even a card to say congratulations). I hate how she thinks that everything is ok because it's not! I hate how she acts like her shit does not stick. I hate how two faced she is. I hate that she does not have one picture of her daughters laying around the house but she has tons of pictures of my two brothers. I hate that I am the only normal person in that family and I am the outcast. I hate that she lies to me and then when I call her on it she acts like its my fault.

I hate her and I could go on forever and I may add to this later and I need to release more anger. I also think that I am going to earse this blog maybe and start over. I feel violated!!!

new blog

2007-05-12T23:55:00.000-05:00

this is my new blog...all I have to do is take a picture and send it from my phone (I am soooo in love) I have been thinking about getting rid of this blog or maybey getting rid of all the old posts and staring new with post about pole dancing because that is waht I am really working on and I am into now....but in the meantime check out my other blof and comment please....... http://amidointhisright.blogspot.com/

2007-05-06T08:46:00.000-05:00

I was on the computer today looking at a few links because it's been about 2 years since I have looked at these links and this is what I found.....a different spin on the super soaker.

a little reunion

2007-03-25T09:05:00.000-05:00

So I took a girl that I work with to the block last night and we watched a few girls strip. We were out for about 3 hours and I saw some people from the past. Some that look good and some that look "not so good" there was a fight between the girls late last night as we were leaving the club.

We first went to a club where I knew the bartender. She use to travel with me and watch my daughter while I was dancing in other states and now she is bartending in a club. She has 2 kids now. The last time I saw her she was 17 and now she is 25....time goes by way to fast. She is the one that introduced me to my husband almost 8 years ago. It's crazy to because I watch the girls on you-tube and a lot of those girls can really dance on a pole but there are not a lot of girls who can dance like that at a club.....it's all a hustle game but if they could dance it would make the hustle game a little easier!

The next club we went to was a 2 part club.....its set up weird and in the last 10 years it has been 4 different clubs. The club always seems to make money but never stays open for long. This time the upstairs is used mostly as a "black girl" club the girls can dance and they work their ass off to make the money that they do make but I think that it is sad and that they play up to the young black boys to much and work to hard for a dollar.....there are better clubs to make money and those "young hoppers" are not trying to ease up on that money. I just think that shaking your ass in front of a mans face for over 3 min is to much attention for one man to just get one or two dollars...maybe its just me! All the girls seems to be getting along OK in the upstairs part of the club but I was tired of watching them have to beg for tips so we left to go downstairs.

The bad part about going downstairs is that you have to leave the club and re-enter...it was not like that a few years ago but I guess they want to make people feel like they are going into a different club. At this club we were told to sit at the front of the club but someone else told me that a bartender that I know was at the back of the club so that we me and my girl started to walk. We found two seats and sat down and some "dancer" started to run her mouth. I guess some guy bought her a drink and she was upset that me and my friend (customers) took her seat when she was away (maybe buying drugs). Oh well, she really got upset when my girlfriend did a guest set on her time and stole the stage. I love it!

This was my night...how was yours? I have to go practice on my stripper pole now....see you later!

hi, my name is, my name is.....

2007-03-20T10:00:00.000-05:00

ok, did you think that the stripper exercise people took me away to a galaxy far...far.....away? That's what I would have thought because I have been gone for so long....I have still been around kind of. I did go and I loved the idea of working out like that again but I hate someone telling me how to dance. Dance is about expression and how can you express yourself when someone is telling you how to move and when to move that way? I decided to but a pole for myself so I still have a few passes left and I quit the gym (that was the agreement between me and my husband) and we put a pole up in the extra bedroom. I love it and he is happy also. For anyone that had been reading this for awhile then you will know that I have been trying to get him to buy one for me for a few years and I finally got my way ;)

I will follow up with all of you into he next day or two to see what I have been missing...once again...I am such a bad blogger....oh, for those who care...James now owes me over 15,000 in child support and he is on work release from what I understand but I have not seen my money yet ;(

2007-02-01T09:05:00.000-05:00

I can't believe that I found a place the does stripper aerobics. I am so excited. What is even more cool about the whole thing is that it is really close to me. Right between work and home and I only work about 10 min from the house so as you can see this is close! I was looking for something else online and came across a message board where they were talking about it...how lucky for me hu??? So, they have a free intro class and I will be there this weekend and then I will buy a pass. I already know its a good workout. They don't have to sell me on that part!

I never thought that they would have a place like that around here but I am glad that I found it. I can't wait to use that pole....I know that I will hurt for days after...it works your whole body. Well I guess I will have to tell you more about after my first intro class this weekend ;)

What I Want Wednesday 1/31/07

2007-01-31T10:28:00.000-05:00

I love this bag from Bebe.com...you can find the link on my sidebar with all my other online shopping links. The bag is cute...It's a little pricey for me right now at $119.00 but still not to bad.
I think I will keep and eye on the price though and get it if the price comes down some. Besides I do get my bonus from work in a month and that would be a good present to myself for all my hard work ;)

I have been doing a lot of online shopping lately but nothing is really catching my eye. I'm sorry....I have also been working overtime at work to catch up on some bills so that we can get everything together and maybe move from this neighborhood. We went driving yesterday and I saw this house that has my attention. Its a very old house built back in the 1800's but has an addition and lots of yard. I hope that is stays on the market for a little while and they cut the price down a bit. We are going to do some investigation work on the house but it's really nice from what I have seen.

Anyway, I do not have much else to post today. I have more e-mails to go through and some online browsing to do and then I have to get ready for work....I am working 7 hours of overtime today. I might take off on Sunday to watch the superbowl. It tradition and I never miss one so I might do that! Also I want to say that I have posted more than once a week this month...I think this is a total of 6 to 7 post...Go Dawn!!!! I should have some cheerleaders doing a dance for me right about now.

If you want to pay along with me on what I want Wednesday then please post something that you have found online and let me know so we can online shop together!

relax

2007-01-30T08:37:00.000-05:00

The title says it all folks......that is what I plan on doing today and for most of the day tomorrow. I have been working some overtime so that I can make some extra money to pay off any bills that are laying around and so that we can start to make double payments on the cars. I have not really had time to myself lately. I need to go out to get my taxed done today and I am afraid of how that will go....then we are gonna look at some property and get some real estate books to look over. It should be a pretty good day though.

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Anna went to school mad at me though. My brother gave her a cell phone that he had that can only make an emergency 911 call. I told her to leave the cell phone here because she wanted to take it to school and she got mad about that. I am sorry, I do not think that she needs a phone. She is 10 years old. She is at school or with me or my husband all the time...we are not a 2 working household and someone is always with her....there is no reason for her to have a cell phone. Besides, I am her mother and I see how she uses the house phone....NO WAY! I think that every circumstance is different and as long as your educated then a cell phone for your child can be ok, but....not in my case! It's a waste of money on her. Maybe when I get that big fat child support check I am waiting on we can get her that cell phone she wants..with all the "bells and whistles".

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I guess I am going to spend the day catching up on cleaning and maybe doing some online shopping. I want to start "What I Want Wednesday" again so that I can post what I found that I love the most for you. Ok, I am gonna end this here..you might die when you see I have posted so close to the date of my last post...don't want ya'll to think I am spoiling you ;)

I am missing something

2007-01-27T21:54:00.000-05:00

I feel like I am missing something. We are talking about the possibility of moving and I am ready for it. I am just not happy here. The schools are not great. The people are rude. I want some property and more space in the house and I just want more peace and we just don't have that now.

I will be working lots.....lots....lots of over time this year to get all my bills in order and plenty of money saved so that we can do what we need to in order to move and have money to buy what ever we may need to. I want to move by the time that Anna moved to Middle school and make that the last move EVER!!!!

Well, that is the most recent update....I will talk to ya'll later!

P.S. ~ James is over $14, 500 in child support now....wow, it just keeps adding up!

how can ya tell

2007-01-19T10:45:00.000-05:00

well, how can I tell that I don't post much any more.....let me count the ways....

1) when there are 3 months worth of post on a page that should say that I do not post much.

2) when people visit once a month and post to say "Hey, where are you" that is also a sign

3) when I forget my login to post...That's major sign!

here is what I realized this morning...well, it really started this week. Thanks to a friend of mine...I belong to a weight loss group..not really sure who I belong to a group I have been with this group for almost a year...I have about 25lbs to lose (I know it is not that much compared to what most people in this group have to lose). Anyways, I feel like the outcast of the group, most of the people in the group are very church going people and older then myself. I have always felt like people who are very "church going" are very critical of other people and I do not understand why??? I do not go to church but I am catholic and stopped going to church when I was in middle school when my parents stopped going.

Anyways, I don't know if it is just me but I so not think that people are as nice as they should be and I think that people are really stuck up. In my neighborhood people think that they are better then everyone else. I work a late shift at work by choice not because I have to but because I want to. My husband can stay at home with my daughter and we live very well. I do not have to want for anything. Because Anna does not like Dancing and Soccer she is the outcast and the parents in this town treat her this way. She just turned 10 this week and she wanted to have a birthday party and all the parents made sure to make me know in no uncertain terms that "all the little girls would be busy" really one mother called to inform me for all the other mothers!

Anna was crushed at first but then I took her and her "boyfriend" out for her birthday and now she is ok...that made all the little girls inher school mad because they like that little boy and now they are trying to make Anna break up with him and Anna will not go for it....she knows that they are just trying to make her mad.

It upsets me to see her going through this. I know that they treat Anna like the outcast also because I am such a young mother. Most of the parent in her school had their children when they were in their 30's and I had Anna when I was 18.

new year resolution #1

2007-01-17T09:08:00.000-05:00

To post more often....."yeah right!" like that happened. Sorry ya'll I have had some things going on and this past weekend I was out all weekend with Anna. Her birthday was yesterday the 16th. I took her and her little boyfriend out the the Harbor and we went to the aquarium and also to Little Italy for an Italian dinner. It was a good day. We just had to get the day started off early because of the Raven/Colts game and the Harbor was a mess....there were so many people out and the Ravens still lost!

Anyways, back to my daughters day....I got some really good pictures of them and he bought her a heart necklace for her birthday and he is such a polite boy. This weekend I am going to take Anna to see his hockey game and that should be pretty good and after the game we will be taking them out for breakfast. He asked Anna the other day if she would like to spend the night over his house and that he would ask his mother (ok, my baby is only 10 years old) even if it is just little kids there is no way in hell I will let my daughter spend the night over a boys house!

Its not that serious though....I know that his mother would never allow it either.

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I am working a new shift at work now so I go in late and I come home late...I like it better though and the money is not to bad. I have a little bit more time now because I took a semester off from school. I needed the break! I hope that all is well with ya'll and I am trying to get on here more often...I swear!

Happy New Year

2007-01-01T20:15:00.000-05:00

Hello all.....Whats new with ya'll??? I have a lot of goals for this new year and one of those goals is to write more this year....today was kinda slow and boring I only went out of the house once to get my honey some ice cream ;) Once again do you see what a nice little wife I am???

I hope everyone had a safe and happy new year!

a little math for you

2006-12-23T08:34:00.000-05:00

So here is how it goes......

No more school = more time + Christmas shopping + new position at work = NO TIME!!!

Simple math for you hu?!?!?

Ok, so I am on the computer and I am trying to catch up. I have lots of blogs to read that I have neglected over some time. I also have to go to the gym this morning for my clubbin' cardio class. I love to dance!

I tried to go out last night to pick up one more thing for Christmas and I could not find it and it was just horrible. I hate going out this time of the year. People drive like a$$holes and I just don't want to be out. Not to mention the fact that I was in a car accident on Tuesday and My girlfriend was hit head on on the highway on Thursday and her car is totaled. You can't tell anything happened to my car.....but hers is gone now. She was on the highway and someone was driving like an a$$hole and the other persons car spun out of control and she was hit pretty good....both of her airbags deployed. I am not sure if you have ever been in a car when the airbags deploy but it is not fun at all. I have a little scar under my chin from when an airbag hit me in my face. She is ok now. I was in the hospital with her but she went home the same night and she is sore and scared to death to drive. The car that hit her was 5 car lengths ahead of her and I guess that you can say she was the "lucky one". The worst part is that she was on her way home from work and took a different way home to avoid the traffic and look at what happened.

Tis the season.....I guess!

2006-12-11T19:48:00.000-05:00

I am done with school classes now. I have been working lots of overtime at work and tonight I am just planning on relaxing. I do not have to be at work until late in the afternoon tomorrow and that's good news because my head has been killing me today!

I have a few things that have been going on but I have just not had time to write about it. I still do not have time to write about it tonight unfortunately. I do hope to put another James post out in the next week so that is one more thing I am trying to complete. I have been shopping online and I have added more links to my blog.

I hope that everything is going well with all of you and that you have time to sit back and enjoy this time of the year...it goes by so fast!

I am a free woman...almost

2006-12-09T16:44:00.000-05:00

I have my final exam on Monday for math and then I am done. I am going to take a semester off school and my goal is to get to my goal weight and I will put all my energy into that this semester instead of classes.

Anyways, I was online doing some window shopping today. I could not do real shopping because I had a scare and thought that I lost my credit cards so I had to have my honey call to cancel them and when I got home I found my wallet but I guess I was better safe then sorry! It was scary though. I went out to lunch with a bunch of girls from work and when I checked my purse I realized that I had no money. I had visions of cleaning dishes running through my head (it was not cool).

The next day I had to get gas and I had to actually walk into the store and pay for the gas. I guess I am spoiled because the last time I can remember paying cash for gas was in 2000. It was a little odd for me. My daughter thought it was funny but I hit her with the reality that now "Santa" has not credit to buy her gifts. That got her little smart mouth to shut up real quick!

So this is the most recent drama with me.....how about you???

its a miracle

2006-12-03T20:58:00.000-05:00

OMG!!! It a miracle 2 post in one day! I have decided to get back to posting more often and making post because I want to not because I fell obligated to. I stopped posting because of a person who was posting comments and was leaving nasty comments to me and I never should have let that bother me...this is my space and people come here because they want to read about what I have to say...so here I am. I feel like I have let ya'll down and worse of all I have let myself down.

I am a little upset with my husband tonight because he made a "not so nice comment" about my use of coca cola products. I made a comment to him today that I have belts in the closet and I have not used any of my dress belts since the job I had when I met him....this was seven years ago (after my one and only child) and the belt does not fit me. I am a little perturb by the fact of this. I am upset that I can not wear a belt that I was able to wear when I met him. I really have no excuse. My daughter was already born she was 3 year old at the time so I just got fat over the year. His comment to me today was that a box of soda was gone and that I can not blame him that my belt will not fit me because I am drinking so much soda......"WELL FUCK YOU BUDDY" Don't worry I will lose the weight I was small when I met you and I will get that way again it is not that hard (well maybe it is a little harder now...but I will get there). Man, I am bitchy tonight!

I start my new position at work tomorrow and I hope that things go well. Wish me luck! Oh, I will not keep ya'll updated on my weight loss on this blog but if you are interested you can keep and eye on me on my other blog www.photofooddiary.blogspot.com

I have been tagged

2006-12-03T11:01:00.000-05:00

OK I have been Tagged....I will not tagg anyone here and the reason is because there are not enough people that come here for me to tagg....sorry!!!! If you want to take part here are the rules...........

The rules stateEach player of this game lists 6 weird things about you. People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Dont forget to leave a comment that says you are tagged in their comments and tell them to read your blog

1) I do not like when people bring pets into a non-pet store man that really bugs me! That is a major pet peeve of mine. Please leave the pets at home people!

2) LADIES, DO NOT PISS ON THE TOILET SEATS!!!! I HATE THAT SHIT!!!! DO NOT STAND UP!!! IF YOU NEED TO STAND UP PLEASE GO TO THE MENS ROOM!!!! THAT'S ALL I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THAT!!!

3) I will not touch a bathroom door handle...that's just me.

4) I do not like to touch peoples hands...I will but I have hand sanitizer....I guess it has to do with the fact that I was a stripper and I know where some peoples hands have been and they do not wash.....yuck! (I told ya'll I have some stories to tell)

5) I wear baggy clothes because I think I am fat even though I may look fin in my cloths I am over cautious that way (I think that is the first time I have ever said that before)

6) I keep a lot of things in now because of a comment that was left on my blog months ago and i have lost a lot a readers and I do not comment to comments any more or post nearly as muIh as i use to.

OK now you know all the weird things about me...now its your turn!!!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

2006-11-22T07:42:00.000-05:00

I have been busy again...yep, that's the story of my life. Today is the start of my vacation. I do not have off on "black Friday" but there is not really a sale that I need to fight for so I will do my shopping after Friday. Besides that, I have already started my Christmas shopping for Anna and my honeys birthday is right around the corner so I need to worry about that before Christmas anyways.

I was thinking about shopping for him today...it's just cold outside and I don't want to go out in it...I hate the cold but I guess that's what I get for living in Maryland. I have a few ideas of what to purchase for him but if anyone has any ideas I am open to them. I hate shopping for him....it's hard because he is pickier than a woman but won't admit if he does not like something. I could always go shopping a Victoria Secret for myself ;)

The good news is that I think we are all ready for Thanksgiving now...so that is one thing that is positive. Are you ready for the holiday? Are you staying home or going somewhere else to eat....or both? No matter what you do have a Happy Thanksgiving and a safe "black Friday" if you go out.

James Part 16

2006-11-16T20:39:00.000-05:00

I know that it has been awhile since my last James post and I am sorry....so here is another James post and if you have no idea what I am talking about you can check out the other 15 post here . Sometimes the James posts can bring me down but I got a promotion at work today and I will be making a lot more money so I am VERY happy not even a James post can bring me down today!

for your reading enjoyment here is post #16.......

Well, James and I were living in the motel again and I was busy trying to complete school and making visits to lawyers for legal advised. I did not have the money to get a lawyer to fight my parents. I was not allowed to see Anna. This was not what we needed in our life right now. I wanted to make things easy on James because I did not want him to turn away from me again or start getting high. He was clean after being in jail for three months and this was going to be our new start, a new beginning as a family. We had a future together James, myself and Anna but I was missing the most important part…..my daughter!!!

How could this happen. Even to this day nobody believes that the courts could allow that to happen but it did. We went through three judges before one judge decided that he was going to see my case through. He made the decision that he was going to take my case and make sure that Anna was going to be with me under the condition that he could see proof that we had a home to take Anna to and not a motel. It was understandable but I had been looking for a place to live for a year and we still had no home to call our own. While we were looking for a place to live I could not keep up with that and all the emotional stress and I dropped out of school. I could not keep up. It was the worst decision in my life but I had other priorities and I was going back and forth to court every week. Our court date was Monday morning. Every week it was the same. The date never changed and I saw the same judge every time I went to the court house. It was nice to have a judge that knew the situation so that helped a little bit and to know that he was on my side as long as we got a place to live.

It was a little hard at first to find a place to live because I was living at home and was kicked out with nothing….again! My parents love to do that to me….leave me with nothing so I have to crawl back to them for help. Anyways, James talked to the owners of a Chinese food restaurant because above the restaurant they had apartments for rent. This was out ticket. James and I signed a lease and started to move in. We lived right next door to the motel that we were living in but who cared….we were gonna get our baby back! I took pictures and was ready for court that Monday. I still have some of the pictures that we took. It was a nice apartment and I was gonna get Anna back! Life was perfect.

We went to the courthouse and had the lease agreement and the pictures that the judge requested. My parents were pissed!!! It made me feel good. We were ready to pick Anna up from my mothers but they made it difficult and we had to pick her up from my fathers house. They did that on purpose and made me wait until late that night to get her. I did not really care because I won the battle. James was by my side during the fight and was there for every single court case. Most people would say….”so what, that is what he is suppose to do” but we all know what an ass James is so this was a big deal to me. We picked Anna up that night and took her home…that was such a nice word “home” I had a home and a family!

I started a new job at a convince store. James was watching Anna while I was working and he would go out at night with his “stealing buddy” I could not change that. There was no way that I could change that part of him. We needed money and my working at a local convince store was not going to pay the rent. I remember that I came home from lunch one day and saw his buddy “Doc” he was a junkie…I knew that we were going on a downhill cycle from here. I knew when I saw him that James was up to no good and I had to make some changes fast! I hated my job but I worked until I could find something else.

I remember that my mother was upset about not getting to see Anna she said that she knew that I would keep Anna form her. I guess I should have but my response was “I could never hold Anna from you like you did to me. I am not hate hateful.” I was stupid and let them still see her. Not unsupervised but I let my guard down. I should have walked away then and never looked back! The things that they did keep replaying in my mind. The court paperwork that was filled out against me said that I kept Anna in dirty diapers for 3 - 4 days…anyone who has a baby knows that that is not even possible…it would have fell off her body and the paperwork also requested that I stay away from my mothers home address and that she get custody of Anna because I was drinking and on drugs. All of these things were lies and I had paperwork from hospitals that would vouch for me not being on drugs. I went to a hospital right after I lost Anna for a complication with my birth control and they did a drug test on me then. I went to Johns Hopkins and that hospital is horrible (if you ever go to the emergency room) they think everyone is on drugs and gave me a drug test to prove that I was not on drugs….I hated that place.

So, I had this problem with James and I was outside using the pay phone until the local phone company could set us up with a phone. Anna was not home at the time she was with James and I had to get ready to go to work. I heard two girls talking behind me and making a comment that “she could make money…not as much as us but she has potential” I got off the pay phone and started to walk home. The girls stopped me and asked me if I wanted to make some extra money……..

to be continued…………………

I need more closet space

2006-11-09T21:50:00.000-05:00

A picture is worth a thousand words and that is a good thing because I do not feel like writing about anything today. This is a picture of my hall closet it just has extra shoes and purses in it because there is no where else to place them at this time.

What I Want Wednesday 10/25/06

2006-10-25T09:37:00.000-05:00

I love this head band. It will not slip from your head and has a built in headband so it will stay in place all day long. I totally love and want this. You can find it here. They have several different styles so you have some different looks to choose from. I got the link from fashion inc. as I was not doing my school work yesterday I came across this great find. Something so simple yet so needed in my hair accessories.

The price is not bad either, at only 4.99 each I think it is worth it to look good and keep my hair out of my face. What a find ;)

There are other hair products on the website above so please take some time and look around. You never know what you might find that can be helpful to you.

In my search for some new cute shoes I came across a pair from Victoria Secret they are so very cute and only priced at $60.00. The ones that I am in love with are the brow and gold ones....cute hu?

I thought that you would like them. I wish I could do some more shopping today for my wishlist but...I still have a test to study for and I am still procrastinating as you can tell.

If you have a product that you are dreaming about then play along with me and make your Wednesday wish list and please let me know what deals you find.....I love to shop! You can shop for anything...clothes, cooking gadgets, lotions, makeup, home decor, I just want to know where the deals are. Help a sister out ;)

I should not be doing this

2006-10-24T14:50:00.000-05:00

This is what I should be doing today...reading my business in environment book and not adding new links to my blog and shopping online. Bad habits. I have a test this Friday that I need to prepare for that I am not really ready for. Oh well, I will look good on Friday..but that does not really matter anyways, the test is at home!

I have been doing nothing all day. I need to take a picture of my new boots that I bought from Rave that is not Rave anymore because they changed the name of the store to Lola. Anyways the boots are so very cute!

I have been so crazy the last few days. I have more personal things going on and more reasons why I hate my mother. My brother is in jail and she took his car from him and will not come up with 1/3 of the money to get him out and the crazy part is my brother will not hold a grudge against her for doing this to him....long story but she is so hateful and evil. I should not feel this way about my mother but she is not a normal person...she is not!

I have added lots of links on my sidebar so if you have a chance check out my new and old links...all cool people! You would not be there if I did not like you!

Hello everyone

2006-10-19T08:22:00.000-05:00

Once again I have been extremely busy. I have some very personal things going on right now and some other personal things that I don't mind sharing so this post will jump around quite a bit so stay with me ok?

My daughter was in cheerleading but is not right now. My father begged me to let her join the team in his area and promised me and Anna that he would make sure that they could get her back and forth to all her practices and games and guess what? They lied and broke my daughters heart in such a horrible way. I am so sick that I let this happen to her. I was only trying to let them established a relationship but I should have known that they would have let her down like they have always let me down.

I made it to every game that I could but nobody else was really there to watch her...They all made up shit so they would not have to be there for her. The worst part is that my dad decided that him and his wife needed to up and move without warning from Maryland to North Carolina so now she can not cheerlead anymore. Anna was getting over that but they bought her two winter coats before they left and promised to bring them over and see her before they left for good and instead they gave her some bogus reason over the phone and left the stuff in a bag outside of their home for Anna to get from my brother. Anna was heart broken that they could not come say goodbye to her. They only live about 10 min. away...would that really have been that hard of a thing for them to do???

I have not talked to them since this whole thing and after she cried for over 2 hours that night because they would not come see her I am through with the whole situation!!!

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My brother came to my house after my father moved he kicked out my brother and told him to find somewhere else to live. My dad started a fight with him just to make sure that my brother would not want to move with him. I have tried to tell them that our parents are crazy but they don't listen. Anyways I am not sure why they moved....they are hiding from something the way it was done was not normal..they packed up in the middle of the night to move in with my stepmoms family...it's some crazy shit....

Oh, I am off topic...sorry....My brother came over to give Anna the stuff that they were to busy to bring by for her and when he did guess what he told me???? My sister had her baby and it was a girl names Selena (like the Mexican singer that JLo paid the part of). Now Anna has a sister/cousin all rolled into one. The baby was born and her father is in jail...so he has no clue how cute or ugly his child is. Also my mother had the nerve to call me to tell me how beautiful the baby is (like I would give a shit). Like hello mom....do you not know that your daughter is a tramp and she is sleeping with your other daughters baby's father??? (did ya'll just get that?) My sister is married (or so she says) to my ex....Anna's father and now they have a baby together.

I also found out that they would not let the baby go home because my sister was on drugs and they baby came out addicted so she had to wait a few days....I think she has the baby now "baby Selena" The whole situation is just sick and I just don't understand it.....I am hurt that she could have a baby by the same person I did...It's just not right after everything I have done for her...I took her in and had custody of her because my parents put her out on the street and this is my payment....Jessica was 12 when I had my daughter that is the age that James knew her from and now they have a baby together...sick if you ask me...not so much the age difference but it's my sister and you have known her since she was 12....sick bastard!

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Due to other personal reason I am going to drop 2 of my classes this semester and only sick with the 2 instead of 4 classes. I have to much going on at work and home to study for 4 classes...its just to much!

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My girlfriend and I are going out this weekend. I found a great outfit from Rave in our local mall and these great boots to go with it...I will have to take a picture and show you. I am in a red mood...so I had to buy something red to go out it...I love what I picked. We are going to a club in DC with my clubbin cardio class from the gym and we always have a great time but this club looks like it will be ghetto...but I guess we shall see!

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I have also started Michael Thurmond's six week body makeover and I love it. I have been doing it for a week now and I have my before pictures done now it is the process of losing. I can't wait to see where I am at in 6 weeks. This should be a fun journey. The good news is that I have almost lost all the weight that I gained with my other personal trainer. That makes me very happy. I went to a personal trainer and I only had about 25lbs that I wanted to lose and I gained 25lbs.....I was pissed. I followed the process and he had me gain weight. I stuck with it for a year and gave him the benefit of the doubt but when my scale reached 25lbs higher then my start weight I gave up and now I am doing much better.

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I thought that there was more to say but I am coming up blank right now. I will come back to ya'll later and right now I have some online shopping that I have to do ;)

What I Want Wednesday

2006-09-27T08:59:00.000-05:00

I love, love, love the way this Donna Karen Cashmere Mist smells. Its so clean and fresh! I am not a big perfume type of person but this is not strong at all and within my budget! Not bad to have all the positives in one place at the same time. I won't lie though....there is not much else on the website that my pocketbook can afford but this is a nice piece of heaven for my poor blood that is longing to be rich ;)

If you are as interested as I am go here to look around and purchase. They has soap and lotion..all the extras that you might need also . The price for what is pictures in $75. Not a bad price if you ask me. I love the purse but there are other gift sets or separates if that does not interest you.

I am taking 4 classes this semester so my honey is going to treat me to this when my classes are over. He is sweet like that! I would go out a buy it now but why should I if he is going to buy it for me.....right?

If you have a product that you are dreaming about then play along with me and make your Wednesday wish list and please let me know what deals you find.....I love to shop! You can shop for anything...clothes, cooking gadgets, lotions, makeup, home decor, I just want to know where the deals are. Help a sister out ;)

I think I will get my stripper pole

2006-09-25T21:23:00.000-05:00

My honey is going to set up the extra room as my exercise room and I really want a stripper pole. It is great for a workout and I can get one that can be taken down without a lot of hassle. He is going to look into it for me so I can set up a workout room. I am so happy. I want a place where I can workout without having to go to the gym and I love to dance so the room with be open so I will have the room to do that.

I am also happy that I am almost at my goal weight 20lbs to go and I will be there. After I got rid of my personal trainer I have been doing a lot better. I got back to the basics and I have lost 10lbs and kept it off this summer. Slow progress but it is staying off so that is positive!

I have the day off work tomorrow and I don't really have any plans. I have to study for a test this week and I have a few projects that I can work on.....I also might go into work for a few hours tomorrow but I am not sure yet....I guess I will see where the day takes me.

Nothing much is going on right now. I have nothing important to write about...pretty boring stuff here......sorry!!!

I think I may be normal now....

2006-09-19T06:14:00.000-05:00

I lost my mind a little bit the other night...sorry if your read my post. I could take it down but why should I? If your read it then you already know that it was there right? Why would I hide it now? That would be pretty stupid!

I am going to meet with my girlfriend today. I am not sure if you remember the one I was telling you about that is going to go back to stripping. We are going to have lunch together and I get to see her new place. It is kinda nice now that she is away from her controlling ex that we can get together and be "friend" again. I miss that. I really need my friends in my life again. It is something that has been missing for awhile. I have a few people in my life but who can I really trust that knows my darkest secrets. There are not many people. I have one person I went to school with who reads my blog and the girls that I stripped with. They know all my dirty little secrets. There is a bond there and its hard to let that go.

I have been having a hard time getting sleep over the last 3 weeks and I know I look like death. I need to get to the gym and I I have paper this week that is due for my Literature class about why it is ok for abused women to kill their husbands. I know...Interesting topic....maybe I can copy and past my James posts ;)

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Right now I have VH1 on T.V. and the music sucks.....wait while I change the channel please!

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OK I am back. I found something on the style network "How Do I Look" it is a rerun but it is still better then the depressing songs on VH1.

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So back to what I was trying to say before I so rudely interrupted myself!!! What was I talking about.........SCHOOL...Oh, yeah....K, I am really busy I have that paper to write and I have a test this week in Sociology and I think that class is stupid because is just is! The word that they use are made up and don't even exist I can't trust anything that is taught in that class! I also hate my teacher. I think that she is out to fail me.

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Oh, Do you watch Flava Flav because that show is soooo stupid that I can't help but watch it. It is like a train wreck. You don't want to look but you can't make your self look away. HAHAHA, I love shows like that.

I think that I have done enough rambling on today. I will write more later!

now what

2006-09-17T21:22:00.000-05:00

I know that some of you want a James story but I can’t right now. It’s painful…I hate the bastard, I hate that I had to strip, I hate that I had to drink to take my mind off of everything, I hate that I lost my apartment, I hate that I lost my daughter twice because of that bastard, I hate that I was raped more that I care to count because of that mother fucking bastard, I hate that I live in a car because I had nowhere else to go, I hate that I had to steal to eat, I hate that I talked to a pimp about prostitution because he was not a man, I hate that he was getting high all the time, I hate that he was cheating on me while I was pregnant, I hate that I never cheated on him…….

scary

2006-09-13T10:41:00.000-05:00

I would not want to be drunk a stummble across this painted floor. It looks a little bit crazy! My luck the floor really would cave in ;) that's just my kind of luck! Oh well, Hope that all is well with ya'll. I tookt he day off of work to catch up on some things but as you can see I am wating my time. I guess I should get back to work......bye!

2006-09-05T20:34:00.000-05:00

I suck! I have so many things going on right now and work really sucked this weekend! I was off the last 2 days and that did not really help me any. I still am not really looking forward to working tomorrow even with my special lunch thing for my promotion. I just want to stay home and cover my head and do nothing! I have to work and go straight to school. After my math class I have to deal with my sociology class that I hate. I think sociology is stupid! It is a bunch of made up bullshit that has no substance.

I have somethings that I have to do tonight. I have to figure out what I am going to wear and I also have to look for something else but I can't think right now. I has to argue with my daughter for 4 hours tonight over her homework that made me not do my work. I hate when she has to do spelling sentences. Her teacher should be hurt for giving her that homework assignment. I am so overloaded right now. I think I will go have a drink a relax before tomorrow starts. God help me this is going to be a very loooong school year.

School is in session

2006-08-28T20:45:00.000-05:00

Anna went back to school today and so did I. I have lots of homework that I should be doing but instead I am on the computer writing in my blog. I hope that ya'll are doing fine. I know that I had good intentions of writing everyday but I think that only lasted for about 1 day. Oh well, what can I do I am so bust right now. With Anna back in school and I's still trying to catch up at work from my vacation life is just bust not to mention the 4 classes that I am taking this fall.

I will try my best to stay up-to-date with this blog. Also I plan on writing another James post soon. I have not done that in a few months. I just hate to take myself back to that time in my life....it's painful. For those of you who have no idea what I am talking about you can check my profile and view the blog of "my crazy past."

Well, I have homework to do...talk to ya'll later!!!!

back to work

2006-08-23T20:08:00.000-05:00

I had to get back to the real world today. Vacation was over for me and back to the real world. I hate to admit it but I like working sometimes and the people I work with are pretty cool. That really helps make the day go by a lot easier.

I worked a little bit of overtime today to help gather some money for shopping trips. If I plan of losing weight I have to purchase hot new clothes and that cost money right?!?! Anyways, I am working a little bit of overtime for extra spending money to also get the credit cards paid off by Christmas time. My husband keeps me in line with our spending...that's why I love him so much.

Ok, enough with all that mushy stuff......do you all know that Christmas is right around the corner...once September gets here the year is over! I hate to break it to ya'll but that's the truth. I hate this time of year. I hate the reality that the year is over and there is nothing that I can do to try to slow it down.....help I feel like I am falling......

is it called getting older or smarter?

2006-08-18T07:01:00.000-05:00

I have a girlfriend that I use to work with almost 7 years ago when I was stripping. She stopped dancing 3 years ago and now she is getting ready to go back. I tried to let her in on how she could make it without dancing but she really does not want anything out of life than that. It is all she knows.

It is what she has done since she was 15 and she is in her 30's now. She looks great but needs to stop at some point right? Don't you have to get a "real job" and take care of your family...after all this is the reason her marriage is breaking up. She was not just a dancer she got "sucked in" and let money control her actions. As her daughter starts high school I just do not think that it is a good idea. It's hard to hide the lifestyle from them and that is not something she wants for her daughter.

I think back on it every so often and I think that the money was good and we had a lot of fun. The job was good at times. I mean really....where else can a girl listen to music, drink, flirt and make money. Now...I am not sure what women think about strippers but trust me we do not want your husband, boyfriend, man or whatever he is.....all we want is his money and if he comes into my club my job is to take his money. I really miss those days. We sure did have some fun times.

We got some crazy ones also. I could tell you some stories that would turn your stomach. There are some sick mother fuckers out there. There are also guy who just want to talk to a nice girl (really) and it's nice when you get guys like that. There were times when we would break down. It was bound to happen to us. It's hard to deal with the guys some days....it gets to be too much. There are other days when it is like a power trip. I was talking to a friend who told me that a guy once told her to look at her self in the mirror and she did..there are mirrors all over the place. She saw herself but had lost herself and could not really see "her" it's all a game....you are not really "you"....you are who ever they are paying you to be....."you" have no identity....."you" think you do but really you are a plastic doll waiting to be told what to do. You have a some boundaries but for the most part you are there to make a man happy and he makes you happy with money the more money the more happiness that goes around.

I guess that she wants this feeling back.....I will be there for he no matter what...we have been friends for over 9 years now and we have a friendship tattoo on our ankle a group of girls I danced with got tattoos to symbolize our friendship and our struggles together.

I forgot where I started

2006-08-17T14:32:00.000-05:00

I started my blog for me and in that whole process I lost myself. I worried about who was reading, who I might offend, how many comments I might get, what I should write about that would entertain and be funny. In the midst of that crazy process I lost myself. I stopped thinking or even caring about what others would think. I keep everything in. I felt bad for some of the readers who would come by to visit me because I just did not have time to visit them. It got overwhelming and here I am with maybe 3-4 post per month about nothing.

It not that I don't have anything to write about because I do. I have lots going on on my mind. I have been really bust with work and school and making the extra time is hard but I have so many things that I would like to get out in the open.

There is a guy I worked with for almost 5 years until I get my new job. He was on the front page of the paper with his wife and three girls. They take in foster children. The three girls are adopted by him and his wife and they are in jeopardy of having them taken from them. There was a very long article in the paper about their situation. I know that his girls are his life.

A few weeks ago they had a 5 year old girls dropped off at the house until court the next morning when the judge would determine what would happen to the girls mother (I think the mother was arrested for drugs and prostitution). The 5 year old girl put a teddy bear under her bed and ran away from the foster home. The girl was not found missing until the next morning. When the police were called they said they found the girl that night about 2 blocks away looking for her mother and they took the child. The woman checked on the children but does not turn on the light to make sure not to wake them.

That family also had a boy that they were hoping to adopt that they have has since he was 3 days old and the police took the child (now 1 years old) away from this family and now they may lose the girls over this.

I know this family and I know how they are with the children. Something like this could have happened to anyone. It is very sad and bad that it happened but this child was determined to leave and she did. But to tear a family apart like that is wrong. I hope that it works out for them in the end. They have taken in more than 300 children in one year and have opened their home to over 1,000 foster children. This is not a way to treat a family that cares. They do not do it for the money....$22 per day is about all they make per child. This is not enough to feed and clothe them. They really do care.

I was nice today

2006-08-15T20:20:00.000-05:00

I had a nice relaxing day. I spent the morning with a friend from work and we got a body wrap. It was nice and relaxing and I really enjoyed the quiet time and I even lost 10 inches and the major bonus before we even got started I found out that I lost 2lbs....what great news! That was just the best way to start my day out.

I meet my mother for a movie. I never go out to the movies but I decided that with her health problems that we should try to spend some time together and watching a movie would be perfect because we would not even have to talk to each other. We had a pretty good time and stopped to get dinner. I have had a busy day and I am tired. We are going to the ocean tomorrow and I need to get my beauty rest. I will think of ya'll tomorrow while I am at the beach....not!

I did it

2006-08-14T07:08:00.000-05:00

I went back to school and I passed all 3 summer classes. Everyone I talked to told me that they did not think that I could do it but I did! I am so happy! I start fall classes in 2 weeks. I am on vacation this week from work.

Greg is treating me to a body wrap tomorrow for all my hard work and I am going to go see a movie with my mother. Wednesday we are going to the ocean for the day and the rest of the week we will find things to do around the city. I think we are going to the zoo one day.

It will just be nice to not have to work for 9 days and have time off school also.

hello

2006-08-08T15:28:00.000-05:00

Anna starts cheerleading today. We went shopping for outfits for her to workout in. I love the fall lines that our out in the stores now. I can't wait to go shopping for me!

I get to take advantage of a body wrap in a week. I will be off work for 9 days and I don't plan on doing anything!!! I can't wait! I have one more class and then I am done with my summer classes. Not bad for my first time back to school in 10 years. I have my math final in Thursday. Wish me luck!

are people really that stupid?

2006-07-25T13:29:00.000-05:00

I mean really.....do they really not know that a car will flip over when you yank the car steering wheel from side to side to try to jump one car ahead on the traffic. I just think it is so stupid. I have had this problem twice in the last 2 days. I have not been cut off the road but it just amazes me how stupid people can be. I guess I watch Cops and Police Chases on T.V. and I know that can happen.

I love my life and my car a little to much to do something so stupid and insurance is expensive too. I can't have that going up just so I can try to get up in front of one person.

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Gas prices are getting higher as each day passes. I hate it! I just go to work, school, and sometimes make it to the gym. I really can't afford the gas prices to go anywhere else.

I need to start working some overtime at work but Greg thinks that I will be working to much. He does not want me to over work my self with school and all of that. I just want to get ahead of all the bills for school, and Christmas will be here before we like to admit it. I think this year I will be going to a store called "Five Below" for Anna. They have lots of really cute things really cheap. I love the stuff in that store so I know that she will. She starts charlatans again in 2 weeks. School in a little over a month and I only have 2 weeks between my summer classes and my fall classes.

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This is about all that is going on with me right now. I have math homework to do and an essay to write so I will have to come back to ya'll later.

time flies

2006-07-17T08:58:00.000-05:00

I can't believe that it is the 17th already. I have been very busy. I started my first real in the classroom college class and I have my first quiz today! I will do ok though...it's for extra credit.

I went out on Saturday night with 53 people from my gym to a club and I really do not remember to much about the night. I had to work early in the day and I did not eat much (my bad) so I got sick and spent most of the night being babied by my friends. "It happens" It has not happened to me in a very long time though and the shoes I wore hurt my feet so bad and I was hardly even up dancing (that was a blessing in disguise).

The sheriff came to my home on Saturday to serve me with papers because James wants to have his child support order lowered because he is locked up and not working. Tell me how this sounds. He wants it lowered because he is in jail for selling drugs......that would mean that he had money before he got locked up right....but he never paid before he got locked up. He was only suppose to be in jail for this year but he got one more year added to his sentence because he got caught with more drugs in the jail. HAHAHA! What a dumbass!

That's all that's has happened in my life.....

Happy 4th

2006-07-04T21:18:00.000-05:00

I am sitting at home this 4th. Nothing exciting. I am not feeling well and I am working on my school work and updating my datebook in my cell phone. I have to get up in the morning to go to the gym and workout on this new machine that they have call the wave. This new machine is the best. I can get a great workout in as little as 10 min. I start sweating like crazy. I love this new machine. It is like rollerblading without falling on my tush.

I start my in the classroom class tomorrow. I have to take a math class to complete my summer classes. Then I get 2 weeks off of school and then jump right back into it again. I am going to take a week off work as soon as this math class is over in 5 weeks so I can get a break from everything for a full week. That will be so nice and I need it and deserve it so much!

the rabbit died

2006-06-24T19:31:00.000-05:00

Yes, that's right...my sister is pregnant with my baby's daddy's baby. I guess I am equal to a "Jerry Spinger" show now. I will let ya'll know when I will be on the show so you can watch me.

I guess the "girlfriend" law does not apply to sisters. I fell betrayed but it is what I would expect from her. She is trash and there is nothing that I can do to change that. I would have thought better of James then that. Never in a million years would I have thought that he would sleep with my sister and now she is pregnant. Yeah, like he really needs another bastard child running around the streets. He does not claim all his children and then the one he does claim...my daughter...he won't even take care of.

and these are the days of our lives........

thongs????

2006-06-20T14:07:00.000-05:00

This is the time of year for a good joke like this. Some women have not right to wear a thong...watch and see.
http://www.ladyskylar.com/swffiles/thong.swf

just because

2006-06-14T18:06:00.000-05:00

Not that things have been hard at work lately but I just thought this was cool!

what type of car are you?

2006-06-13T06:39:00.000-05:00

I'm a Chevrolet Corvette!

You're a classic - powerful, athletic, and competitive. You're all about winning the race and getting the job done. While you have a practical everyday side, you get wild when anyone pushes your pedal. You hate to lose, but you hardly ever do.

Take the Which Sports Car Are You? quiz.

monday meme a day late

2006-06-06T11:24:00.000-05:00

Monday Meme 41 : 2006-04-02 : Spring Forward

1. List 3 things you like about spring:

I love the sunny days, I love to drive my new car with the sunroof open and the music blasting, and I love to walk outside for no other reason then just walking in this beautiful weather.

2. List 3 things you hate about spring:

I hate bugs, I hate that spring does not last long where I live because we seem to go straight from winter to summer, that's about all I hate!

3. Do you set your clocks forward in the spring? Do you think it is a good idea?

I set my clock forward in the spring because I have to or else I would be late for work.....I guess it is a good idea because I would hate to to not have a job...I love money!

4. Do you have allergies in the spring? Do you take any allergies medications?

Everythng makes me sneeze...I hae never been like that before so I am trying to get use to it.

5. What are you looking forward to the most this spring?

I am looking forward to it being extremely hot so I can sweat off a few pounds ;)

I was the 1,681st person to take this week's Monday Meme!

school thang

2006-06-04T17:03:00.000-05:00

I am still around I have been working for almost 2 weeks straight without a day off and trying to get in the swing of school. Things are going well. Anna is on a cruise and my stepson is here for the summer. I have the next 2 days off work and I have something around the house I want to get done. Hopefully the next two days will be productive.

I am sure I have something else to say but I have lots of e-mails to get caught up with. I hope all is well and I will catch up some more over the next 2 days....

now what

2006-05-22T19:44:00.000-05:00

So, my school classes have started now and I am not sure what to do now. I love to learn but I hate to write and I hate to read something and try to understand it the same way my whole class understands it. I want to read something and take something personal away from it...yes I am greedy, I don't want to share my feelings with others. Please just leave me alone and not have to dissect some writers meaning when they may not have wanted me to try to understand every single word that was written. Am I alone on this? Now I have to write about a group or a team on was on in my youth and tell about how great we were and all the wonderful that we did for the community.....does dropping out of school to run with Anna's father and live a life of lies, stealing, drugs and pregnancy fit in there somewhere.....what about when my mom was drinking all night with her friends "the local bar sluts" and I had to stay home with my brothers and sisters and watch all her friends kids at the same time. I was running a all night daycare at age 12 and people wonder why I am all fucked up these days....hmph!

not yet

2006-05-18T08:41:00.000-05:00

Well, my mother never made it to the 6th floor. She is back home again and I guess she is fine for right now. I am doing well. I work today but have the next 4 days off. I am getting a body wrap as a birthday present tomorrow...that should be fun. I start school classes on Monday and My new work schd. starts in 2 weeks.

I feel good today. I went for a 3 mile walk today and I feel good. I only know it's 3 miles because it is a trail that I walked on and there are markers. It was nice to walk outdoors for a change. I have something I have to do in a few min and then it is off to the gym for some real workout time.

I hope you all are doing well and I will catch up with everyone tomorrow and add some people to my links and take a few off. Time to make some changes around here.

6th floor

2006-05-15T16:21:00.000-05:00

My mom is still in the hospital and we have this running joke that she will be moved to the 6th floor when she is ready to die. See the last time my mom was in the hospital she was told that her roommate was going to be moved to the 6th floor so her family could have more room. They were really moving the woman so she could die in a room surrounded by friends and family and not a roommate. The woman was 97 years old and ready to let go...it was her time.

When my mom told me this I told her that she will know if she is in trouble because the doctors will move her to the 6th floor. At the time she was on the second floor. Since we had that talk she was released from the hospital and is back now. This time she is on the 3rd floor...she is moving up. This is our "joke" she does not have many lives left.

On a real note, I was a good daughter and called her in the hospital to wish her a "happy mothers day".....no I love you's were said but I was nice. She in not doing well...in December she was in the hospital with 3 heart attacks....I am not sure what has happened from December till April but I can tell you that in the last week and a half she has been in the hospital twice....and they have been overnite stays. She has fluid around her heart and lungs and is having problem walking without becoming short of breath. She also has diabetes. I am really concerned with the health problems in my family and I need to take better care of myself. My grandfather had high blood pressure and died from a heart attack and my grandmother had breast cancer and so did her mother. I feel like I am doomed.

My mother is taking this well....she does not want to worry about the diabetes..just one thing at a time. She is not really changing her eating habits. She has always been one to have lots of salt and greasy foods. That will never change and we are all aware of that. I guess we should worry if the next time they take her to the 4th floor..........

I'm baaack

2006-05-13T22:56:00.000-05:00

I guess I am back kinda sorta in a way....My Birthday was Tuesday the 9th and I had so many Birthday wishes. I did work overtime so that was a little crazy but I'm ok. Mothers day is tomrrow and my mother is in the Emergency room because she can not breath. This is her second trip in a week and I am getting myslef prepared for the worst. I am not sure how to take it. I know is is near.....she is not doing well at all. I guess I should contact her tomorrow to wish her a Happy Mothers Day because she did wish me a Happy Birthday.

I hope ya'll are doing well. Leave me a comment so I know if anyone is still coming by....I need to feel loved ;)

busy

2006-04-27T10:58:00.000-05:00

I am trying to get things together for school in less than a month and Anna gets out of school soon. I have lots of weight issues going on right now and I also have lots to do around the house. I am thinking about taking a blog break or moving on all together. There are younger prettier blogs out there to view and I really have boring things to say right now. I may be back I may not. If I come back I may just start over with a new blog all together so if you want the new link or want to keep in touch e-mail me and I will let you know about my new blog address if that is what I decided to do.

Thanks for your time and comments,
Dawn

what turns you on?

2006-04-22T13:52:00.000-05:00

This question is the most interesting to me because I use to strip but this question is more to the men than the women but...please I would like an answer from everyone. If your woman did a slow, sensuous strip tease for you and left only two things on what would you want it to be? (women....ask your man or just leave a comment with what you think would be the best two things that a man would want you to leave on.)

My personal answer is heels and some piece of jewelry.....necklace or bracelet.....maybe earrings but to me that is so common. Tell me what you think.

spring cleaning.....yeah right!

2006-04-22T11:03:00.000-05:00

Day 1: I slept all day.....yes that is all I did....I might have done some dishes but I really just slept all day. I don't even remember eating. I did go to the gym early in the morning.

Day 2: I got my hair done at the salon...that was almost an all day affair. When I got home I went to Wal Mart with Greg but we did not buy much. On the way home we got stopped by the state police because he was not wearing a seatbelt. He got a $25 fine. He refuses to wear a seatbelt. When he was in an accident in the past and had his seatbelt on it did more harm than good, due to all the surgeries he has had on his back it can throw his back out of place and he can become paralyzed a lot easier then if he was to wear his seatbelt......so we took the ticket and kept on going. When I got home I fell asleep again and my honey covered my up with a blanket and let me rest on the couch. It's those simple things that he does for me that really make me love him so much. I'm so easy to make happy ;)

Day 3: Well, it's 12:08 and I have not been real productive today so I guess I will get off the computer and do something. Maybe if I throw everything away the house will be clean and there will nothing that I will have to do for the next 2 days....sounds like a plan to me.

vacation

2006-04-20T17:26:00.000-05:00

hey, even if it is only a mini vacation it is still time off right?!? I slept most of the day away. I should have been cleaning but I still have 4 1/2 hrs left of my day so I can get lots done. It felt so good to sleep and I did get my workout in this morning and Anna off to school so I was productive today. I am also making a blog post so how great am I? I hope that I can stay this productive for the rest of my mini vacation. I have a few minor things I really need to complete and I am going to get my hair done tomorrow...that will be at least 2 maybe 3 hrs of my day right there. It's ok though....it's worth it.

I am going through all my e-mails and decided to stop by and change my post for you. I am sorry for the poor people that stop by to check on me and all you see is the same old boring stuff. I hat writing about my weight issues because it is boring.....there are things going on with Anna and my family but that is so personal and there are some people who I don't mind having you read it but there are others that have no business knowing about it so instead of having to explain the whole situation...I just leave it out. Work is another thing that is personal so that's out to........wow, I guess I am pretty boring....not sure why some of you still come around but I love you for it.....I will try to do something stupid and interesting so I will have some good stuff to write about so you don't fall asleep at your computer desk....sorry ya'll.

spring cleaning

2006-04-17T17:50:00.000-05:00

I had the day off work today and I have been trying to catch up on all the neglect on the house. I am taking off Friday through Monday so I can concentrate on making my home beautiful again. I also have to work on making me beautiful again because I have not been taking the time for me. I will get everything back on track this week so there will be no excuses....I can't seem to get anything done when the house looks a mess.

Anna is outside today playing with her new soccer ball she got for Easter and I had the house all to myself for a few hours today. That's not normal in my home. It felt good to have the TV off and just spend the time in a quite house cleaning.

Nothing interesting to say. I have found a few things that went right n the trash...things I have not seen in years and have no use for but nothing to blog about....sorry

it's that time of year again

2006-04-13T12:05:00.000-05:00

SANDAL PLEDGE

Just a friendly reminder, it's that time of year again.
Please raise your big toes and repeat after me:
As a member of the Diva Sisterhood, I pledge to follow. THE RULES when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes:

I promise to always wear sandals that fit.My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.

I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.

I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow. I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed gorlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back in the place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.

I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Sholl's if my feet need him.

I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kid's sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat, and I would hate to take someine down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

I will take my toe ring off towards the end of the day if my toe swells and begin to look like Vienna sausages.

I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she asks me if her feet are to ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her her toes look like they have been dragged behind her car on the way to work and not snadal in the world is going to make her feet look good.

I will promise if I wear flip flops, that I will ensure they actually flip flop, making the correct noise while walking and I willswear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

I will promise to go to my local beauty school at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $15 and worth EVERY penny). I say spend another $15 and get an even better one.

Last but not least....PLEASE DON"T DO THIS..........

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I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear...nothing is tackier then dirty white sandals....

For all our sakes, please don't keep this to yourself - pass it on to other Sisters. May God Bless your Soles and well as your Soles!

just a normal day

2006-04-12T08:09:00.000-05:00

I had to take Anna to school yesterday morning and there was a moffit truck on the main highway and all the sudden something fell off the uncovered moffit truck onto the road. It was crazy. I could not see anything in front of me and you can't slam on your breaks or you will cause an accident and I had to watch where I was going because you can't see what the person in front of you is doing. I could not see anything that was going on in front of me.

It was kinda cool though...almost like being in a nascar race! Only my insurance would go up for something like that so it take the whole "fun" thing away pretty quickly. When I drove by the spot again about 20 min later you could still see the smoke but I don't think anyone had an accident because of it but it was close.

I love nascar....not a big fan of anyone specific but I do love the commercials that they put the guys in...pretty cool! I like to see Jimmy Johnson lose only because I use to work at LOWES and I hate LOWES!

Have a great day ya'll.....oh, by the way....I did not do any good shopping yesterday so no shopping pictures yet....sorry ;(

2006-04-11T12:37:00.000-05:00

I have pictures to post this week. My girlfriend gave me some special gifts and I am shopping today for shoes. With summer right around the corner I need new shoes! I hope to have the pictures posted by tomorrow but I have a doctors appointment and I may not have the time tomorrow...but I will try!

what's overtime????

2006-04-09T18:15:00.000-05:00

I know I have not been around much. I decided that I will not work any overtime this week and I have today and tomorrow off work. I really need that time off.

I will be leaving my house in about a half hour to pick up my girlfriend from the airport. She is coming in town to see some friends and have her pictures taken. I worked with her when I was dancing and we just really got along well. She is one of those types of people that seem really stuck up but she is so down to earth that you would be amazed. Most people can not understand our friendship but she is only one of 2 people that I use to dance with that know me and Greg and are welcome in our home. Here is an old site that she was on, the pictures are a few years old check it out http://www.bbrent.com/reba/ .

We go back almost 9 years. She has some gifts for me because I have not seen her since I got married so she has some shot glasses for me (I collect them and she travels alot) and some extra shopping gifts. I just love gifts!

I guess I should get ready to go pick her up from the airport. I write more later.

Clean house

2006-04-06T10:08:00.000-05:00

I need someone to come clean my house...no applications necessary...if you want to work for no pay but lots of thanks then please comment. I will take anyone......anyone...PLEASE HELP ME!!!

Ok, I think I have pulled my self back together. I really should not be on the computer because there are so many other things that I can be doing instead. I have .5 lbs to lose by Saturday to reach my weekly goal. I have lots, lots, lots (oh, did I mention lots) of cleaning to do. On the weigh loss subject I am changing my eating habits and adding lots of fruit. That is something that I have not done in a long time. Summer is around the corner and I want to have fun when I go shopping for clothes.

Work is going well. I can't believe that I have been at this job for almost 6 months now. Wow, time goes quick. I am finally getting the hang of things and working life around work a little bit better. I am trying to juggle so many things. I hope to get caught up over the weekend and things will be a little bit better.

Anna is going on the cruise with my mother. I don't feel like she really should go the way her attitude has been lately. That's another story in itself.

day off work

2006-04-03T14:51:00.000-05:00

I guess my life is just to boring and not with enough drama to write about. I had the day off work my car is in the shop so they can do a check up on it....the brakes are acting funny and I wanted them to look it over.

Greg and I went out for lunch. We went to Long John Silver's for some fish. It was kinda nasty but I have never been there so we decided to give it a try. Mondays have started to be "our day". We always get out of the house to do something. It does not really matter what we do as long as we are out of the house and together. I really look forward to having lunch with only him. It is nice to know that every Monday this is something that we do. It makes my week go by faster.

My girlfriend that is working with my sister is back in town and working with her again. She could not wait to call me to tell me that Jessica is pregnant with James baby and that she is still working at the strip club. I told her that I just hope that the baby will be alright......I kinda lead her to think that Jessica may have an illness that may effect her baby. I know that maybe I should not have made that comment but I really don't care about Jessica having a baby by James who is locked up right now. James has another kid that is being raised by one of Jessicas friends because James is in jail and the baby's real mother does not want him and Jessica did not want him so now he is passed around until someone says that they will take care of him. It's really sad....I would take that kid and Greg and I have already talked about it....who knows it may happen. That kid should have a better life then he has now.

I hit my mother with the truth that James gave up his custody rights to Anna and really only has visitation so they went to the jail to see him for nothing. That felt good to. See I am not starting anything the time is just right to hit them back where it hurts.

Anyways, I have been working about 50-60 hrs per week. When I come home the last thing I want to do is see another computer. This is why my post have been so spotty....sorry.

I am getting ready to sign up for school and I am so happy about that. I will go for business management. Life is just really good for me now. Anna is doing well in school. She is really catching on to all the lies and how much my mother tries to start things. My dad and stepmom do not agree with the lies but never say anything to mom about it. I don't waste my time with it either. I really don't feel like getting all worked up for nothing over that. Anna knows not to lie to me and she can't...I don't go back to my mother so I don't upset Anna.

I am not to happy that my mother gave Anna a frs radio so she can talk to people through a walkie talkie system. I was pissed...I made Greg explain to Anna why she can not use that and why I do not want her to have access to that type of thing. I don't want to perverts on the radio talking to my baby. We live in a sick world and my neighborhood is safe but not that safe!!!

liar, liar, your pants are on fire......

2006-04-01T09:49:00.000-05:00

Ok, Have I mentioned that my family lies, cheats, and steals? Well, they do. The most recent thing that is going on is that my mother thinks that she is so cute and can lie to me and have Anna try to lie to me but it just does not work...the worst part about it is that I could really care less about the whole thing but they make it worse by trying to hide it.

Anna has been spending the weekends with her grandmother. I know that I have said that I hate my mother and all the mean thing I will do to her but......she is Anna's grandmother and she would not do any harm to her so I let things go...I don't have to like her though! Anyways, so Anna is over there and my mom takes her to visit my dad and stepmom and they all act like it is a big secret and they tell her not to tell me.....It is mostly coming from my mom (she is the one telling Anna to lie). Of course, my daughter can't keep something like this from me long before she starts to run her mouth.

I did get some type of justice though. My mom wants to take Anna on a cruise with her and her husband in May. I said that was fine.....no problem. I have to get her passport before they can leave. I made my mom call around to see what I need to do to have this in time. Well, If Anna is going out of the country they need BOTH parents to sign to allow her to go. I told mom....oh, I guess we have to find James. She go all upset about it...said that James is in jail (I already knew that). She said that because we both have custody of Anna that he need to be there or sign something to let Anna go. My mom was going on about how horrible this is and how can they let someone in jail have rights over Anna. I reminded her that she is the one who paid for his lawyer to fight against me to get those "rights" and now she can explain to Anna why there will be no cruise. The best part of the whole thing is that they (my mom and stepmom) have been in contact with the jail to get James to sign the necessary paperwork but they paid all this money for a lawyer to take Anna from me and to have James awarded custody but guess what.....James only have visitation....I have all rights over Anna...they have no clue! I don't need James so sign squat! Anna is ok with the fact that she "may" not go....she will still be in school anyways when they leave. My mom is still trying to get in touch with James and when I mentioned her paying for his lawyer she just changed the subject (she did not know that I knew she paid for his lawyer). She also does not know that the lawyer took the money and dropped James as a client because he could never get in touch with James.

See things really do come back to haunt you and I am there to watch it and laugh at how stupid you really are.

hello

2006-03-26T23:43:00.000-05:00

Hey ya'll, Just wanted to let everyone know that I am still alive and well. I have been working mega overtime at work and I just have not been on the computer. I have been checking the comments left on my account through e-mail from my phone. Thanks for the responses on my last post.

I hope everyone is doing well. I really fell bad that I have not had the time to check on ya'll......anyways, Anna is with her Grandmother who has a major lying problem. She has been taking Anna to my fathers house...because my parents are divorced and they all lie about it....I don't care...they act like I care and I really don't......I just hate that they have Anna lie to me about it!

James is supposed to be in jail for something stupid...he is over 10,500 behind in child support..it just keeps going up and the court system does nothing about it...they could care less...I guess that I like the idea that he owes me...at least I know that I am never broke.

Nothing has really been going on with me. I have been busy working and working out...Just no time to really get online. Life is great at home...I love my job and life is pretty normal and boring except for my whole weight loss issue but who like to hear about someone complain about what they weigh??? Right???

I had a few drinks tonight and I am just relaxing. I will catch up with everyone tomorrow because I have the day off work.

what do you think?

2006-03-20T19:32:00.000-05:00

What makes a person unforgettable? I know that when someone is outgoing and friendly that really stands out for me and shows me that you are not afraid and will be fun to be around. What about you?

phone

2006-03-18T13:00:00.000-05:00

I got an e-mail yesterday that my new phone was shipped to me and I can't wait...I am getting the verizon wireless LG9800. The phone is awesome and I think that it even makes me breakfast in the morning....no, I'm just kiding but this phone does a lot! I am not crazy like everyone else seems to be over that stupid razor phone (sorry, if you have one) but really the battery can't be all that great and the phone is to skinny for me...I like to have something that will hold up if I drop it or get pissed and throw it....I don't think a phone should be that thin! I have seen people act so stipid over this phone and paid almost $400 when it first came out and now you can get the stupid thing for nothing! What do you think about that razor phone??? Don't hold back...let it all out!

2006-03-16T12:23:00.000-05:00

Hello eveyone, I really should be getting ready for work but I really wanted to stop by and visit a few blogs that I have been neglecting. I miss having the time to keep up with ya'll. I hope everyone is doing well.

I am trying to keep up with my other blog also ~ www.photofooddiary.blogspot.com if you hae time stop by and see me. I have been so busy. I have to manage my time better becasue I feel like there is just no time. I would be real happy to just get a decent nights sleep. It is 12:30 and I have to get ready for work. I have my gym bag to get together because I am going to work out for a half hour at dinner time. I have all the extra time for my dinner hour so I might as well use it in a good way....right?

I should have some time this weekend to catch up with ya'll and update you on my life also. My mother is crazy...just in case you forgot....I will explain later!

help me out ya'll

2006-03-15T12:52:00.000-05:00

ok, so I have not been doing all that well with the whole working out and eating right thing. I will keep up with my photo food blog and I will show him what is really going on with me. I have a meeting with Todd on Monday April 10th and he really wants me to give him all I've got over the next few weeks.

This is what I have to do.....I am going to workout Monday-Friday....at 8am after I drop Anna off to school for 1 hour...Monday, Wednesday and Friday and 1/2 hr of cardio and weights....Tuesday and Thursday and 1 hr of cardio. Monday-Thursday I will walk for 1/2 hr on my lunch break at work.

He has me on a eating plan for my weight days and then something different for my cardio days. He has changed my protein intake to more almost 3 oz more per meal on my cardio days.

I made a promise to him and I will do it! I will keep up on my blog so I can show him what I am doing and if you want to keep up also please check it out....the blog is in my view profile page...I will keep up with it starting Thursday so check back with me.....any help or ideas are welcome. Thanks for joining me on this journey.

ain't she puuurty

2006-03-13T16:56:00.000-05:00

I love, love, love my new car! I promised to post pictures so here they are.....

See I told ya'll that she was pretty. I had to clean her today because all the birds in the neighborhood love her too because they have all decided to shit on my car to take that newness away from it.

Here is a view of the back of my baby!

Not bad for a 2002 Grand AM. It only has 30,000 miles on it and not a scratch that I can find. Look at the inside.....it's beautiful!

The best selling point for me was the sunroof....look at the view .........am I cool or what?????

Well, what do ya'll think???

I got it!

2006-03-12T20:04:00.000-05:00

I got my new car!!! I love it...I have not had the chance to update ya'll on my car situation. It has been beautiful outside the last few days and I have been driving or working! I fianlly had a day off today and the weather was awful. Yep, that's my luck.

Oh well, I will post picture tomorrow of my baby.

is it true

2006-03-08T08:44:00.000-05:00

The saying is that good things come to those who wait....well, I have waited forever! I hope to have a picture up tomorrow of my new baby....yes, that's right I hope to have my new car by tonight!!!

I'm so happy...not to happy though because that could bring bad luck with it. I think that I will start to ramble on so I will leave you to leave me comments to wish me luck because ya'll are sweet like that!

that's so slutty

2006-03-05T16:14:00.000-05:00

I was talking to a friend the other day who wanted to know why I started working as a stripper. It was not like most people would think....I saw an ad in the local paper for dancers. I was mad at James because he would not bring home the money for rent and I had to worry about Anna.

Working at the local Royal Farms store was not cutting it so I decided to light a fire under his ass by making the call to see what the whole dancing thing was about. I was asked to come to the local club for an "interview" I did not need to perform on stage they just wanted to make sure that I was not 400lbs and nasty to look at. I was offered a job and I sat around the club for about an hour watching what the girls do. It was noon and very slow in the club. I remember sitting there with my soda in hand and watching one of the girls give a guy a lap dance. I was thinking to myself that these girls are sooo slutty and there is no way that I could/would ever do what they were doing!

I left the club and meet James and Anna a few blocks away. I told James that I was going to work at the club just to get him upset and make him realize that he better start doing better.

2 weeks later I called to talk to a very close friend of mine to see what she thought about the idea and to my surprise she was pretty cool with the idea. I don't think that she knows but if she told me that it was stupid I would have thought twice about it. Anyways, I called and talked to the bartender that hired me and asked her if the offer was still there to work and she said I could start the next day.

I wore this outfit that was not what you would normally see a stripper wearing...it was not nice for my figure and the shoes I had did not really have a heel to it and I still had trouble walking in them. One of the girls decided to lend me an outfit so I would look better. The outfit was hot pink and it was booty shorts and a really tight tiny top.

The girls I worked with were really nice to me and that's no a normal thing in the stripper world! We had this initiation process and they did it to me on my first day. They got me really drunk and played 3 of the longest songs in the jukebox I must have been on the stage for a good 45 min before the music went off and the final part was to strip me completely naked! We were not really suppose to go totally nude in the club I worked at....they can now but it was different a few years ago.

I guess I was just a freak in hiding and just needed a drink or 2 to bring that out in me.

LG9800

2006-03-01T13:15:00.000-05:00

This is a picture of the phone that I want....I am just waiting for Greg to make up his mind about what phone he wants to get so I can purchase mine.

I like the phone that I have now but I can do so much more with this one.....I use my phone so much..it is my date book/my means of communication/phonebook....etc and I can use this one as my music player also.

Oh well, I should have my new phone in the next month or two I'm so excited!!!

What phone do you have? What do you think of the phone I want to get????

Let me know.

oh yeah

2006-02-28T10:38:00.000-05:00

Things are great! I took a personal day off from work yesterday and today is my "day off". Back to things as usual tomorrow but for right now I am loving my day off. I have been productive. Anna is going to change schools....my mother is going to be watching Anna while I am at work which is a good thing for her and Anna both and of course I am getting what I want out of the deal also....Anna can go to another school. I have been going rounds with her current school and things are finally going to get better. I was also able to get her schd to see her new doctor because I have some thing I want to go over with him.

I also got my whole cell phone situation fixed and now I have the unlimited text and picture messages that I was waiting for and I can also check my e-mail from my phone. The next thing will be that I will get the new phone on my wish list....the only thing is that it is $200.00 but will work as my "mp3" player and cell phone....anything to save space!

I also have made much progress is the "spring cleaning" and I have lots of things that are going to change in the house this year. I am getting caught up yay!!!

I also will be getting a nice new car in March....it's about time. I will miss my car even though we have this love hate relationship but it is time to move on...besides it will still be around because my stepson is going to get my car. After all the money we sunk into it we can not just get rid of it completely...besides I am getting a new car because Greg does not want me driving my old car home late at night because I am going back to my late shift next week and I can't wait! I am not picky about my next car it must have power door locks and power windows...hey, if I have to have the car for 5-6 years then it must have this...I work hard I deserve it.....

so many choices

2006-02-26T18:03:00.000-05:00

I was trying to think of a good plate to have on my new car....this looks like a good place to start.

wanted

2006-02-21T18:51:00.000-05:00

I am looking for time....lot's of it.....well, not really LOT's of it just enough time to clean the house, make my healthy meals for the next day, stay up to date with everything going on with Anna, time to spend with my husband, time to spare to make overtime money at work, time to register for school and time to look at all the options open to me, time to work out, time to papmer myself, time to blog, time to keep up with my blog friends, time to find a new car, time to shop, time to be a wife, mother, career woman, friend........etc~do you get my point? Does anyone have this to spare....I am willing to pay BIG bucks!

what?

2006-02-16T22:46:00.000-05:00

I feel like I have been through hell this week! The worst part is that the week is not over yet! Last week a girl that I use to dance with was in town to work. Yes, she is still dancing and will still be dancing in 20 years from now....I still love her though! Maybe I will take that back after this post though.

She called me because there was another girl named Renee that she was working with. This was a slap in my face. My stage name was Renee...this is what she still calls me to this day and the strange part is that even though I stopped dancing over 6 years ago and stopped people from calling me by my stage name...I still answer to it...when I hear the name Renee I turn to see who is calling me.

Anyways, Jessica (my sister) is using my old stage name....(she is not clever enough to come up with her own). It hurts because I know that my girlfriend only called me because she was looking for a reaction from me. I did not give her the satisfaction. She told me that Jessica is living in a motel and her and James are not together now. I don't really trust anything she says and I really don't care. It does hurt that she would not have called to say she was in town if she wasn't working with my sister.

Happy V-Day

2006-02-14T13:48:00.000-05:00

snow

2006-02-12T12:19:00.000-05:00

I am sitting at home today. The snow has stopped any thoughts of working overtime to make that $$$$. I was planning on working overtime with another girl I work with..she is my partner in crime and the reason I eat so much Chipotle.

There is not much to do today...just eat chili...watch tv and sit around and look cute all day. I plan on enjoying the day and eating lots of chili.

Below is a picture of my girlfriend from work. This was at our party for work after all
the training that we had to go through.

I have meet some really great people at work. I love my new job. There is a lot to learn and things are always changing but I will finally be able to go to school to make more $$$$$. That's what it's all about after all right?

I want to get a new car by March so I need all the overtime I can get. I should be getting a nice bonus check soon and raise in May and if everything goes as planned I will be getting
another raise in May...if everything goes as planned. How cool is that??? $$$$ Do you see the dollar signs??? Because I do. $$$$$

So anyways, back to the snow.....Look at how much snow is on out mailbox. The roads are looking pretty good. Everything should be fine when I leave for work tomorrow morning....I hope!

I was like a little kid yesterday when it started snowing...you could hear the excitement in my voice. I love the snow!

I mean look at this picture I took last night....beautiful! How can you not love this time of year.....I hate the cold but the snow makes up for it.

See the white dots...that's the snow falling....It really started to stick to the roads late, late last night.

Even though I did not go to work today I still had
to clean off my car. It is not perfect but I am not going anywhere today anyways. I love my car...it shines even when it is dirty....that is the only thing that I will miss about it when it is time to get a new car....oh, I will also miss my cd player...I love my cd player!

So, now you know what I am going to do today...how about you?!?!?

Is it snowing where you live? Are you bored today? Are you going to watch a movie...give me some more ideas so I am not stuck cleaning today!

what do you want to be when you grow up?

2006-02-07T21:13:00.000-05:00